need a bandaid? i'm your girl.

i had 8 hours of cpr/first aid training.  i'm guessing many of you are familiar with what an amazing experience that can be.  here are the three most important things i learned:

1. a symptom of heat exhaustion is a normal body temperature. 

2. a symptom of anaphylaxia is a sense of doom. 

3. a symptom of a stroke is slurred speech or speaking in a way that others can't understand you - like pig latin or something?

those made me laugh

tons of reading has been happening lately, as vacation should be. i'm in the middle of five books which is an excellent place to be. these weeks have not been without struggle, but they've been good.  it seems like as soon as learning takes place and new things are revealed to me like it has been with all this reading, my life becomes difficult and i hit issues and bumps that i was not expecting.  relationships suddenly seem rough and i feel like i'm hitting my head against a wall. after listening to a series of sermons that have really moved and challenged me, i feel like a cloud is on me and what used to be easy is now hard; what used to be simple is suddenly complicated.  even spain is somehow hanging in the balance with new possibilities.  i'm feeling the weight of graduating college and my instinct is to run.   i keep picturing myself as being handed a real job and then failing miserably and having everyone around me realize that i'm still just a kid, i'm incapable.  i know these are just fears but they seem real and the unknown is always scary. funny how spain seems like the safest thing right now - mostly because it's still theoretical. i don't know the city, or the school. i haven't booked my flight.  maybe i won't book a flight.  but if i don't go now, when will i go?  part of me feels like i'm being childish and naive putting off a "real job" to go hang out in spain, like i'm running away from responsibilities and routine. part of me just wants to go to india now and work on an ESL curriculum for the centers to use in the future but my health would not allow me enough time to finish.  I'd also like to use my experience in Spain to help me develop the curriculum better.  but that's where my heart really really is.  i want to be somewhere were i'm needed and where i'm stretched to grow and am constantly relying on something bigger than myself. but growth brings so much pain sometimes.

basically, i dunno.

but i can perform first aid.  

so that's something. 

vacation

day 1 of no school, work, anything.
loving it.
got another job offer to teach here in omaha - esl and spanish. every time i get one step closer to spain, something happens to make me question my decision. this is the second freaking awesome job offer i've turned down, and for what? i don't even know if i'll be able to get treatment in spain. i'm not ready to resign yet though, if nothing else, this will be an adventure.
spend a couple days in norfolk and lincoln for graudation. it was good to see everyone but i'm definnitely loving being alone at home for now. i still have my booklist but have spent most of today cleaning and unpacking. thank you cards are also on my to-do list.
not sure what the next two weeks will hold - but i'd be perfectly happy fi they didn't hold anything at all :)
job starts june 1st - i'm sure it'll be here sooner than i had hoped.
i miss my kids and colleagues more than i had imagined, but i know i'll see them soon enough.
for now, life is good.

done!  graduation went well.  I had a couple awards dinners to go to, and the ceremony wasn't as bad as i thought it would be.  The party at teddy and nora's was a blast and it was great to see some friends I hadn't seen for a while.

Spain said yes!  Andalucia (southern spain) is my area, but not sure of the city yet - they'll tell me in June.  I'm stoked though! Should be quite a bit different from the Spain I studied abroad in when I stayed in Bilbao in the north.  I do hope to make a trip there to say hey to my host family, though.  Allison got in to - she's in Castilla de la Mancha so we'll be close :) or at least closer than anyone back here in the states.

I've got three weeks of vacation that I am sure are going to go by WAY faster than I'd like them to, and then summer job for two months.  Still working on my reading list.

it's been great spending time with guero and family - both of ours were here for my graduation, minus his brother.  

Still haven't really felt any change - I still identify myself as a college student, saying I'm officially a teacher just sounds too weird and i feel like i'm cheating saying that since i don't teach right now. I don't think my life will change that much, as strange as that seems - being a teacher means I will always have the familiarity of "school" in whatever shape it comes in.  Spain will be a challenge, but teaching is home for me.  We'll see what comes after that adventure.  For now, I'm just excited for the next step, and for my vacation :)

thanks to everyone who came out or wished me a happy graduation - it was great seeing and hearing from you all!

sorry it's been a while, you see, i'm trying to graduate college.
my last day teaching was yesterday, kind of. i'm having trouble giving my kids up (surprise!)
my last day at south is next wednesday, and oh how the tears will fall.
this is all so funny now when i think to how close i was to dropping out only a month or so ago. i don't know what clicked, if i finally caught on to teaching and found my rhythm, or if i just got rid of seventh period and picked up another class and that is what helped, but whatever it is, it has not only allowed me to finish the semester but allowed me to finish well.
thesis = done. i'll let you read it if you're looking for a super boring read with a lot of fun graphs on it. - it's on writing in the foreign language classroom -- student products versus assessment expectations. basically, the most exciting thing you'll ever see. ever.
no news from spain yet, but i'm not too worried about it. it's hard to be worried about anything when you're about to graduate :)
party at teddy and nora's soon - it'll be a blast, even if no one shows up. family is family is family, and i love that.
i've begun my booklist for this summer - 10 is my goal again. the hardest part isn't even reading the 10 books, it's picking only 10 to try and read. jm - feel free to hit me up with a list you think i should read - i've already got some picked out. but am not sure what to read as far as non-fiction goes.
-jonathan strange and mr norrell
-leaves of grass (again! i just like it)
-practicing the presence of God.

i've got a ton of others on the list - i'm trying to narrow it down.

mikey is moving home next week - praise be!! i'm so freaking excited to be in the same state as that boy. he's one of my absolute favorite people, as well as one of the silliest.

i've got 3 minutes to get ready before i need to go. also, i think you should know i've been "brushing my teeth" while i've been typing this. my mouth is starting to hurt. haha

also, please come to my graduation party!
6105 Madison Ave
Lincoln, NE
Saturday, May 10th 2pm - 6ishpm

loves,
jen